.. or The Lair watches as the Phillies win another straight National East Division Title! The original HBT post is here.
Well that was a grueling weekend. Dropping two of three to the Mets! The Mets of all teams! Craig had just changed his Bathrobe and refilled his bubble pipe when he sat on his high chair to this morning’s paper and video highlights. The screen was already on showing the various bloopers and heroics of the weekend. He had to type up a Weekend Wrap-up pretty soon. At least no obnoxious bobble-heads were lying around, there was no package on his table… but then he spotted something on the mantle of his fireplace… was that- Jimmy Rollins!?!?!?!? He needed to install new security in this place!
Craig walked slowly to his fireplace crossing his arms puffing bubbles like mad as read the tag: “Still the team to beat baby! 5 Straight Division Crowns and counting!”. Craig frowned and basically read the toy figure the riot act: “Get your act together and stop playing scrubs against the Cardinals! You do still need to secure home-field advantage! The one time I root all year for you and you disappoint me… Those who disappoint me aren’t usually around for long…”.
He grabbed the bobble-head and was about to casually toss it into the fire when Drew Silva’s head lit up on the display in a corner.
“Hey Craig how are you doing? What’s that in your hand? A Jimmy Rollins bobble-head? Tsk, tsk, Craig I know it’s in your rooting interest for the Phillies to beat the Cards but holding a Phillies toy like an idol? You’ve reached a new low. Now I suppose you’ll be offering it rum.”
Craig was annoyed and set down the figure on his table and pointed at the screen with his pipe. “Watch it Drew, I force-choked the last person who crossed the line with me. You’re early, the meeting doesn’t start till ten in the morning.”
“Well I wanted to say hi first before we got down to business, tough luck on that weekend series eh? At least the Falcons beat the Eagles right?”
“I’m sorry what? Who are these falcons you speak of?”
The Phillies have crowned themselves NL East Champions for the 5th straight year! It never gets old hat. I remember watching Atlanta crown itself year after year in the 90’s and low ’00s. That was an impressive run the Phillies can currently only dream of matching but who knows, maybe the success will sustain itself for the next decade… one can hope that the Phillies are due for a couple of decades worth of perennial contention seeing that they had some of the worst 30 seasons of baseball between 1916 and 1945.
Craig is having a fit that the Braves have played badly against the Mets and that the Phils haven’t mopped the floor with the Cards but they are resting some regulars and trying to heal for the post-season, home-field Advantage should come soon enough. As for the punchline… one mentions Football to Craig only at one’s peril…