The Lair sneers at Tony LaRussa’s managing skills

Original HBT post here as usual.

And so it comes down to this, end of season, playoff games, and the Brave’s primary nemesis, the Nationals firmly in the way. The chess set was laid out on the coffee table in front of the fireplace. This time though, the Nationals figures were in white. The game was sort of half played, as Craig had moved pieces around, tried to figure out the possibilities of a positive outcome for Atlanta.

He was sitting in his high chair, clearly in a good mood, puffing bubbles from his pipe in rather generous amounts. His Braves bathrobe was neatly straightened out. He awaited the morning call in front of his 70″ LED display. Tiffany was on time (as usual) as the square head-shot appeared in a corner of the screen.

“Hi Craig! Want to go over the points we’re going to address in HBT Daily?”

“Naturally my dear Tiffany, I have the topics of interest here in the Craig list”, he replied. Pressing a button on his chair, the screen split on the left side and started enumerating a series of points and possible topics. He had added quite a few this morning:

* Kemp, NL MVP?
* Epstein and the blame game.
* Brad Pitt, chicks and Moneyball.
* Aquaman must die!
* Pujols is a Jackass.
* Chipper lost ball in fight.

“You seem to be in a good mood today Craig,” said Tiffany as she scanned his topics and compared them with her own notes. “Craig I think that should read Chipper lost ball in light…”

“Oh! Thanks for the correction,” said Craig. “We’ll use ground ball in stadium lights, to make it clear.” A button press later and a keyboard extended from a hidden slot on his chair. He proceeded to type in the change while addressing her comment. “I’m a good mood yes. Anytime Tony LaRussa successfully snatches defeat from the jaws of victory is worthy of a heckle and a good bourbon. You know, I have to say, I didn’t know the Mets had it in them.”

“We should also add the Twins breaking their 11 game losing streak Craig. I know it happened a few days ago but still. Aaron must be happy.”

“Oh sure why not. It was about time, after that 11th straight loss Aaron was in such a funk he almost didn’t make it… he very nearly deleted his blog. They called the police and fire department just in case. In the end Drew slowly talked him out of it, but it was touch and go for a while, the man had his finger hovering over the mouse button the entire time, one click away from ending it all… How sad when people get so wrapped up in the game that they take it so seriously.”

Tiffany held a bemused expression as she said: “Oh? So I suppose you weren’t the least bit worried by that Cardinals-Mets game last night at the beginning of the 9th. When it seemed like the Cardinals were about to win it?”

“Well I have rooting interests, so naturally I will invest myself in the game, but it’s important not to go overboard.”

“Right, so you just happen to have a bottle of cyanide on your table as a center piece?”

Drat! He kept forgetting the generous camera angle from his side of the conference, curse his healthy ego. He waved dismissively at Tiffany. “That’s for the occasional rat I must poison. Let’s get HBT Daily started shall we…”

If I get into a regular groove I think I might do one of these every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Which won’t preclude me from adding extra bits whenever inspiration strikes. The Braves … er .. Nation? Neighborhood? Tribe? No, that’s the Indians… well whatever the collective fan base calls itself can breathe a sigh of relief at the miracle Mets.  There are 6 games left. No more half-game standings. The Cardinals sit 2 back, the Giants sit 4 back. The Braves control their destiny, if they win 5 of 6 it don’t matter what the Cards do, though something tells me they’d better hope the Cubs and Astros put up a fight.

In the AL, I had the privilege of seeing the last Toronto Blue Jays home game. There’s a vocal fan base that hates Vernon Wells. It was almost J.D. Drew like in its passion. Edwin Encarnacion hit the walk off blast in the 12th inning. The man is known to the locals as the Dangerous Bat and the Dangerous Glove. Primarily because he’s been tearing the ball off the cover lately and he tends to flub the ball a lot in the infield, with little range. The best position in the field for Edwin it seems is DH. At least according to the locals…

The talk of the media though is the Red Sox, and there’s much speculation at what the Yankees will do now that they have clinched the Division. Russel Martin swears by Crom that he will crush the Sox. We’ll see what kind of line-up Girardi puts up for the weekend. I’m sure many a Yankee will prefer to eliminate Boston now in a 3-game series at home than risk facing them again in a 7-game ALCS series.


  1. Kevin S.

    Let’s be serious, the Braves have a Reservation. Offensive, sure, but so is the team name, logo, and unoriginal Tomahawk Chop they stole from Florida State.

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